I just want to cry on someone’s shoulder right now. I’m glad my mom isn’t home right now because I don’t want her to hear me cry. I want to talk to someone but everyone’s either at school or just busy. I don’t want to be a bother. I always feel nervous about asking someone to talk. I don’t usually initiate conversations because I feel like I’d be a bother. A friend just texted me a few minutes ago but I don’t want to talk to him about what’s on my mind. Everyone says he has a thing for me and that makes me nervous. I just want to tell him, “I’m sorry, but I’ll probably hurt you” because my heart is still in a haywire. It has been for a while. It’s ridiculous. I’m so sorry, man. It’s not fair to the both of us. He’s hinting at watching movies together, which sounds okay but just wouldn’t be fair. I’d be physically there, but my mind would be elsewhere. I just can’t.

I can’t focus on schoolwork. I’m trying to calm down.

Maybe I’ll just go back to bed.

I don’t know what to do.

/rant